12 Of The Pettiest Things People Would Do If They Were Rich

I think a lot of us imagine if we stumbled into millions of dollars, we'd transform ourselves into these giving, caring saints of wealth. But in reality, we'd probably be more of less the same people. Some of us might even pull of some hilariously petty, rich person shit, like these 12 people:

1. Strike_43425 -- No faster way to get hated.

use the "Why dont you just buy a new one?" in every situation possible

2. RogueNine -- You should do this anyways. You don't need to become rich first.

Buy up every $1 coin of the most obscure President I can find, then bribe people obnoxiously. "Would a couple of Millard Fillmores change your mind?"

3. truthm0de -- Never let their filth touch your precious body.

Upon meeting new people, I would take my glove off to show respect before I shook their hand, only to reveal yet another glove to shake their peasant hand with.

4. _wdpike_ -- That's why there's traffic ahead. Some rich guy did that.

In the middle of bumper to bumper traffic, just get out of my car and walk away.

5. discostooo -- Oddly specific.

Design an underwater breathing apparatus for ostriches. Then, strap on a Scuba suit myself. Ride it into the water close to a private beach where no one can see. Migrate underwater to the busy part of the beach and come storming out of depths on my aqua ostrich. Run around for a while then go traunching back in the water

6. bollykeys -- Just holding a bundle of 100s would be nice.

Take out a bundle of hundreds everytime I pay and complain about not having enough

7. SoClashic -- Bill Gates probably does this each and every day.

I would pay actors to pretend to be civilians and follow me while I do mundane things. Upon encountering rude people, I would cause a scene with the help of my employees to really confuse/annoy them

8. A_Human_Or_Dancer -- Well that's just rude.

Buy the most expensive sports car and drive 10 mph below the speed limit everywhere I go.

9. Errtai_ -- Sorry sir you're going to jail. Being carried in a palanquin is a class A felony.

I would hire four ripped dudes to carry me around in a palanquin. I'm almost positive I wouldn't be breaking any laws. People on the subway may not be happy about it though.

10. redditor_85 -- The sad thing is you would get soo many followers.

Start an Instagram account that shows me living a joyous life that only the top 0.1% of the world could live. Write captions that declare money doesn't matter. Use hashtags like #liveauthentic and #eatpraylove.

11. DraglineMonco -- I've got a hunch this person didn't like their old neighbor.

I'd buy all the property surrounding my old neighbor and convert them into a trailer park

12. RubixRube -- Yes. The best answer.

Tickets be damned, I would just park wherever I please.

from CollegeHumor: Pictures http://ift.tt/2DbIoZr