1.
My mother likes to use the microphone function rather than typing to text while driving. http://pic.twitter.com/vshphoob4V
-- Gerald Austin Taylor (@AustintatiousT) June 14, 2017
2.
last night while locked i saw someone tweet "what if Mario was just the hat all along possessing a hapless plumber" and i couldn't sleep
-- ANTHONY OLIVEIRA (@meakoopa) June 14, 2017
3.
Me: Where are we at?
-- vince (@mortimermaiden) June 14, 2017
Accountant: I'm confused--you're paying me to count numbers?
Me: *staring into distance* I need to know how high they go
4.
At the local deli. What could have happened to make them put up that sign?? http://pic.twitter.com/7BzPNjFm1L
-- Anna Haensch (@extremefriday) June 14, 2017
5.
did you know you can only call him frankenstein's monster if he was made in the frankenstein region of france
-- alexis nedd (@alexisthenedd) June 14, 2017
6.
when you retweet yourself http://pic.twitter.com/69lDwt2PYg
-- Tristan Cooper (@TristanACooper) June 15, 2017
7.
it rules that this goony motherfucker is a sex symbol for millions of pre-teens. he looks like a twitch streamer. http://pic.twitter.com/TwSVSHsFby
-- bobby (@bobby) June 14, 2017
8.
http://pic.twitter.com/qX6TaWaXjk
-- CITIZEN KRANG (@KrangTNelson) June 15, 2017
9.
Idk y men go to bars to meet women? Go to Target. The female to male ratio is 10 to 1 and they're already looking for things they don't need
-- Mr. (@marcus_sullivan) May 20, 2017
10.
help http://pic.twitter.com/oqCweY5fC0
-- christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) June 15, 2017
11.
Your daily news schedule until 2020:
-- dead by millennials (@jesseltaylor) June 14, 2017
6-9 AM: terrible things happen
9:15 AM: funny meme
12-6 PM: Senate hearings
6-7 PM: scoops
12.
Yo mama so fat, http://pic.twitter.com/okNFQsyUZe
-- katie barsotti (@notTHATkatie) June 14, 2017
from CollegeHumor: Pictures http://ift.tt/2rnqHBq
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